Jun 16, 2025

One Woman's Journey Through Abuse, Healing, and Rebirth

The One by One podcast creates a sacred space for individuals to share their most vulnerable stories of faith, healing, and transformation. Through compassionate interviewing and authentic conversation, the show provides a platform for guests to explore how spiritual principles intersect with real-life challenges, offering hope and guidance to listeners navigating their own difficult seasons. The hosts' commitment to honest dialogue creates an environment where guests can share deeply personal experiences that might otherwise remain hidden, helping others feel less alone in their struggles.

In this episode, Lisa courageously shares one of the most inspiring examples of spiritual transformation emerging from the depths of personal crisis. As a mother of six children who endured 19 years in an emotionally abusive marriage, her journey challenges conventional wisdom about staying in difficult relationships and demonstrates how divine intervention can create miraculous change in the human heart. Her experience offers hope to anyone feeling trapped in toxic situations while providing insight into the complex process of recognizing abuse, finding personal identity, and making life-altering decisions guided by spiritual revelation.

Coming from a background of strong faith and natural testimony, Lisa entered marriage believing her spiritual foundation would carry her through any challenge. However, the reality of her relationship proved far more complex than her young faith could initially comprehend. What began as typical marital difficulties gradually evolved into a pattern of emotional manipulation and gaslighting that left her questioning her own sanity and spiritual connection. Her eventual transformation from a silenced, confused wife to a spiritually empowered woman willing to make difficult choices represents a journey that countless individuals will recognize in their own lives.

This exploration of Lisa's experience reveals how spiritual growth often requires us to move beyond comfortable assumptions about faith, family, and personal sacrifice. Her story demonstrates that sometimes the most faithful choice isn't staying in harmful situations, but rather having the courage to pursue healing and authenticity, even when that path leads through temporary darkness toward eventual light.

The Spiritual Wilderness: Lost Identity in Marriage  

The early years of Lisa's marriage appeared successful on the surface, complete with children, church activity, and the external markers of righteous living. Yet beneath this veneer of normalcy, she began experiencing a gradual erosion of personal identity that she couldn't initially understand or articulate. Her natural testimony, which had always provided spiritual stability, seemed insufficient to address the complex dynamics emerging in her relationship. The confusion arose not from a crisis of faith, but from the subtle ways her husband's private behavior contradicted his public persona, creating cognitive dissonance that she struggled to resolve.

As the marriage progressed, Lisa found herself increasingly isolated from the spiritual connection she had previously taken for granted. The gaslighting she experienced created a devastating cycle where her spiritual impressions were consistently undermined by her husband's insistence that her perceptions were wrong. This systematic invalidation of her internal compass left her feeling spiritually adrift, despite maintaining outward religious observance. She describes this period as a wilderness experience where she believed in God but couldn't feel His presence or guidance in her daily struggles.

The most damaging aspect of this spiritual drought was how it affected her sense of personal worth and divine identity. Years of being told that her experiences weren't real gradually convinced her to stop trusting her own spiritual impressions and emotional responses. This disconnection from her inner voice created a profound loneliness that extended beyond her marriage into every area of her life. She began questioning not only her judgment but her fundamental value as a daughter of God, setting the stage for the health issues and depression that would eventually force her to seek help.

The Turning Point: Divine Intervention and Healing  

The transformation began in 2016 when Lisa reached a breaking point of anger, depression, and disconnection that she could no longer ignore. Pregnant with her sixth child and feeling utterly lost as both a wife and mother, she finally acknowledged that her current path was unsustainable. This moment of desperation became the catalyst for spiritual seeking that would completely reshape her relationship with God. When she accepted the challenge to give up social media for a week, dedicating that time instead to scripture study and conference talks, she began experiencing the spiritual connection that had been missing for years.

This period of intensive spiritual focus created space for divine revelation that had been crowded out by the chaos and confusion of her daily life. As she immersed herself in spiritual content, she began recovering her sense of divine identity and purpose. The woman who had lost herself in trying to fix her marriage and meet impossible expectations started remembering who she had been before the relationship began. This recovery of identity became the foundation for all the changes that would follow, providing her with the strength to pursue therapy and begin setting boundaries she had never thought possible.

The most remarkable moment came in 2018 during a bishop's meeting with her husband, when she experienced an instantaneous divine healing of years of accumulated pain and resentment. This miraculous experience of complete forgiveness wasn't something she generated through willpower or positive thinking, but rather a gift that transformed her heart in ways that felt impossible through human effort alone. The healing gave her a clean slate emotionally while simultaneously confirming her divine worth and providing clarity about her situation that had been obscured by years of manipulation and confusion.

Recognizing Truth: When Love Isn't Enough  

Despite experiencing miraculous spiritual healing and renewed connection with God, Lisa's marriage continued to struggle with the same patterns that had created problems for nearly two decades. The divine intervention had changed her heart completely, but it couldn't force corresponding changes in her husband's willingness to acknowledge and address his abusive behaviors. This painful reality forced her to confront the difference between miraculous spiritual experiences and the ongoing work required for healthy relationships. She learned that while God could instantly heal her heart, creating lasting change in their marriage dynamic required both partners' active participation.

The process of recognizing emotional abuse proved particularly challenging because it required her to reconcile her love for her husband with the reality of his harmful behaviors. Years of being told she was oversensitive or imagining problems had conditioned her to doubt her perceptions, making it difficult to trust what she was seeing even when presented with clear evidence. The therapeutic process helped her understand that abuse often coexists with genuine affection and that her husband's inability to change didn't reflect a lack of love on either side, but rather indicated deeper issues that required professional intervention he wasn't willing to pursue.

Learning to set boundaries while maintaining love required Lisa to develop skills she had never needed before. She had to practice saying no to behaviors that harmed her while still offering support for positive changes. This delicate balance proved exhausting and ultimately unsustainable when her efforts weren't met with corresponding accountability and growth. The recognition that she could love someone completely while acknowledging that remaining in the relationship was destructive represented a mature understanding of love that transcended the romantic ideals she had carried into marriage.

Key warning signs Lisa learned to recognize included:

  • Consistent invalidation of her emotional experiences

  • Isolation from friends and family support systems

  • Pressure to keep relationship problems secret

  • Physical symptoms that couldn't be medically explained

  • Feeling like she was "walking on eggshells" at home

  • Loss of interests and activities that brought her joy

  • Constant self-doubt about her perceptions and memories

Starting Over: Courage Through Faith  

The decision to end her marriage required Lisa to overcome tremendous fear about her ability to provide for six children as a single mother. Without significant work experience or financial independence, she faced the prospect of rebuilding her entire life while managing the emotional needs of children who would also be affected by the divorce. However, the spiritual confirmation she received about this decision provided strength that transcended her practical concerns. She learned to distinguish between reasonable planning and faith-paralyzing fear, choosing to move forward despite uncertainty about specific outcomes.

The period immediately following her divorce presented challenges that tested every aspect of her spiritual development. Former friends and community members who believed her husband's version of events turned away from her, creating additional isolation during an already difficult transition. Yet she discovered that the spiritual practices she had developed during her healing process provided stability that external support couldn't offer. The early morning routine of prayer, scripture study, and exercise became non-negotiable elements that maintained her emotional and spiritual equilibrium during chaos.

Perhaps most significantly, Lisa found that her capacity for authentic relationships expanded dramatically once she was no longer constantly managing an abusive dynamic. Her children began seeing a version of their mother they had never known - confident, peaceful, and genuinely happy despite difficult circumstances. The modeling of healthy boundaries and self-respect provided them with tools they would carry into their own future relationships. Her willingness to choose difficult faithfulness over comfortable dysfunction demonstrated that sometimes the most loving choice for a family requires temporary sacrifice for long-term healing.

Your Journey Toward Authentic Living  

Lisa's experience offers hope for anyone feeling trapped in relationships or situations that diminish their divine potential. Her story demonstrates that spiritual growth often requires us to move beyond conventional expectations and trust divine guidance even when it leads through uncomfortable territory. The courage to seek help, set boundaries, and make difficult changes isn't a sign of faithlessness but rather evidence of deep spiritual maturity and trust in God's plan for our individual growth.

If you recognize elements of your own experience in Lisa's journey, consider what small steps you might take toward greater authenticity and spiritual connection. This could involve seeking professional counseling, having honest conversations with trusted friends, or simply beginning to notice and honor your own emotional responses rather than dismissing them. Remember that healing rarely happens in isolation - the support of qualified professionals and genuine community can provide the perspective and encouragement necessary for lasting change.

Take time to listen to Lisa's full story on the One by One podcast, where her complete journey offers additional insights into the process of spiritual transformation and relationship healing. Consider sharing this story with others who might benefit from knowing they're not alone in their struggles, and explore how you might contribute to creating communities where authenticity and healing are supported rather than discouraged.

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